I had a moment yesterday, while floating in the ocean on a boogie board in Strathmere, when I thought I was making a huge mistake, chucking away a kind of life I've known since I've been an adult to move to Colorado to try something new.
It's a big change, even if I keep saying I'm just living there for two months to try it out. Because I don't think I'll be back. In this time home in New Jersey after I adopted Annie, I've been glad to see people and hug my family and friends, but that's about it. I felt dead inside every time I crossed into Collingswood, which had been my home for more than a decade. The weather here has pushed eczema up and over my skin. The issue with my ear isn't cancer or a tumor (thank goodness) but most likely damage from an old ear infection that affects its ability to re-pressurize. Every front that rolled through sent me reeling. New Jersey is rejected my body – or vice versa.
And that's what I remembered as I floated on the ocean: that yes I can come back to this, and of course will to see my family (and eventually get the rest of my stuff). But there isn't much of a life here for me anymore. It's time to try something new.
Have a thoroughly depressed you? Well, I'm feeling a bit melancholy, and stressed. I'm melancholy because I didn't really want to be pushed out (I know, I know…be patient, dear reader for the reason) and stressed because it's another big trip ahead. Annie and I leave tomorrow, aiming at South Dakota to begin the end of #jenin50 before rolling into Boulder on September 1. It's a long way out there. I hope to see some neat things along the way, and if my two months on the road already taught me anything – that's a guarantee.
"How Fast Can You Run One Mile?" for The New York Times
"I'm No Longer Catholic But I Still Carry a Statue of the Virgin Mary" for The Lily
What I'm Reading
I finished Barbara Kingsolver's Flight Behavior. It's not my favorite of hers, but not a bad read. Now I'm back into Michael Connelly land with A Darkness More Than Night.
What I'm Watching
For TV, my mom and I watched Claws, which is A LOT (but good). I'm also watching the second season of Schitt's Creek, which is ridiculous and delightful.
I watched a few movies too. Line up for Jen's short reviews:
- Zoolander 2: This got really stale real quick
- Rogue One: Comforting, like chicken soup
- Emma: Ah, the days before Gwenyth got goopy
- McLintock!: I've seen it before but had no idea it was a loose adaptation of Taming of the Shrew. I also need to see the original Parent Trap again stat.